The TRAVELER…

The image of Indiana Jones’ classic brown fedora and leather jacket might come to mind. The novel image of those courageous individuals packing their bags and plunging themselves into foreign lands far from their native tongue to seek adventure and experiences not easily found at home.

But the reality is that the ‘traveler’ comes in all sorts of variety and often falls short of the romantic image of Indiana himself.  They seek completely different experiences and at time lack real imagination for embracing the unknown.

After a month of traveling, the following observation were made on the travelers found trotting around the world.

–The Travel Douchebag–

• Young arrogant low-budget travelers/backpackers. Although they come to partake in a few historical/cultural sites and share through Facebook, they are often more captivated and drawn in by the party nightlife and the cheap booze and cigarettes. Like ‘flies on shit’ they swarm together and attract the other travel douchebags for a sense of purpose, sense of imagination and sense of safety.  They appear to be afraid to be alone for once in their life to contemplate the big life questions or why they even travel and hope to gain from it besides several Facebook likes. This generation never had to be alone nor wait patiently for something, so it is not surprising they ruin this gift of traveling of gaining a new found respect for the world and people around them. They lack the purpose of embarking an adventure besides the 3AM crawl back to the hostel.

–Free Spirits–

• The ‘hippie’ is not a forgotten idea, these modern day ‘hippies’ cling to various aspects of the free spirit.  The ‘free spirits’ can easily be spotted in foreign streets when they roam barefooted with their dreadlocks and baggy clown pants. At times it is not how you spot them but how you ‘smell’ these free roamers.  With all the modern wonders of hygiene, the local even embrace a cleanliness that the ‘free spirits have abandoned, mostly DEODORANT. It is like a badge of honor or right of passage to accumulate bodily smells and reek havoc on your fellow travelers and local natives.  Although the smell can be bad, maybe just maybe this is a brilliant idea pass down from hippie to hippie. The stench serves as a defense mechanism and repels the locals from hounding them to buy local gifts. Ultimately, while the rest of us suckers are stopped every 4 steps by the next street vendor crying outtheir normal chorus “buy from me” the ‘free spirits’ are left to roam untouched. DITTO

–Dirty Old Men–

• n’uff said!!! With all the worldly pleasures to seek while traveling to foreign lands these travelers exploit the local women by enticing them with the almighty dollar.  Not to fully cast shame alone on the dirty old men the environment they explore caters to their forbidden desires with hopeful women looking to make an easy buck.

–Culture / Adventure Seekers–

• Pressed by some desire to seek some higher desire for knowledge, address some unanswered dreams or gain insight to their fellow man; these travelers embrace more of the local aspects.  Often low budget travelers at heart but splurge on the finer things from time to time to keep sane.  The culture seeker are found wanting to engage with the locals (not the locals working at the pubs) but real locals living and raising family within the area.  The special gift these travelers are rewarded with are the “ah-ha” moments that puts life into perspective and realizing that we are not so different from our neighbors living in foreign lands.  As the SE Asia people say…”Same Same”…which is a true expression that we all have similar needs, similar foundations, similar habits, similar regulations/governments, similar desires, and similar fears but it is often a perspective that Americans have not fully embraced and why should they when they are sitting isolated at the pinnacle of society (so we think).

–Luxury Pampers–

• FINALLY GOT THE DREAM VACATION…or just too old to embrace the hardships of rough traveling like a low-budget backpacker.  Often these retired birds embark on that once promise trip discussed years ago. They are often found in luxury hotels and opt out of meeting with the local on their own ground but would pay a pretty polish penny to partake in over-priced tours. The only feedback and interaction to the local community is through the tour guides and front desk agents.  Live large you old birds…you deserve it.

–Asian Invasion Traveler–

• Hordes of what is often Japanese, Chinese or Korean travel groups. Safety in number is an under statement but safety in a small platoon is a sure bet. You can’t miss the ‘Asian Invasion Traveler’ as they are found disrupting the almost ‘perfect photo’ you waited to take and you waited so patiently for. They have no regard for your photo nor personal space and like the Roman legions lifting their shields from deadly arrows, these ‘Asian Invasion Travelers’ come marching toward you with umbrellas raised high to protect themselves from the deadly sun. If you are lucky enough you might even experience the daylight quickly turning to shade while they march over your helpful soul. Be aware of the Asian Invasion Travelers…the come fast, so you have to keep in front or behind them to survive.

– Jason R.